When Darkness Breaks Read online

  “Okay, Mr. Woods. Please have a seat for just a moment and I will locate your wife, if she is here.”

  Drake barely sat on the edge of a seat nearest the reception desk. His hands shook and he realized he had not eaten since lunch, because he had been waiting for Amber to join him at the lovely dinner table he had prepared. What if he was too late? He vowed to always protect her and the kids, but had let them all down more than once.

  The nurse’s soft voice interrupted his self-abusive thoughts. “Mr. Woods. I’ve found your wife and children. I am going to let you through these doors now, if you promise me you will calm down and won’t upset the staff on the other side.” She had a grandmotherly tone to her voice that let him know she was kind, but serious.

  “Yes, of course.”

  She could tell that Drake was trying to prove he was now in control of his emotions.

  “Okay, sir. Once you go through these double doors, you will see a small waiting room about three doors down. Please have a seat there, and the doctor will come fill you in. He is expecting you. Take these papers and fill them out while you wait.”

  Drake’s feet tore a cautious but swift path to the double doors, and stopped when he reached the waiting room. His hands trembled as he filled out the papers. Then, he alternated between sitting and standing, unable to settle, as he anticipated the doctor’s arrival. After what seemed like an eternity, Drake spied a white coat out of the corner of his eye.

  “Mr. Woods?” A deep, soothing voice summoned him.

  Drake turned to see a male physician, possibly in his late fifties, who sported a head full of dark black hair, and appeared to be in excellent physical shape. He shook the doctor’s hand as he confirmed his name.

  “I am Dr. Davis. I am the surgeon on your wife’s case. We need to talk about your wife’s current condition.” His words were spoken in a matter-of-fact tone, almost with arrogance.

  Drake sat down. The words “We need to talk,” echoed in his mind. He had heard those words from Amber many times, especially lately, and good news never followed.

  “Is she alive?” He could barely summon his voice to ask the question.

  “She is, but remains in critical condition. Amber suffered severe trauma to the head and is currently in a coma. Amazingly, she came through with only a few broken bones, and those can be mended. Our major concern right now is her brain. We were able to stop the hemorrhaging, but there is still quite a bit of swelling left behind. We are monitoring that now and giving her …”

  Drake’s head felt as though it had swelled. His ears rang. He wanted to hear every word the doctor said, but his heart pounded louder than the doctor’s voice, and his tears masked his sight. He pictured his sweet love lying on a hospital bed, hooked up to a plethora of machines and IV drips, as she clung to her last breath of life. He worried about the children too, but felt a powerful obligatory presence with the love of his life in that moment. After all, she was the reason he even became a father. Where have these loving thoughts about her been hiding for so long?

  When Drake’s mind and ears returned to the conversation, the doctor said, “I need to get back to check on Amber now. I will send the Chaplain in to speak with you. Is there anyone else you’d like us to call? Do you have any other questions for me?”

  Drake only had one: “What now?”

  “Now, we wait.”

  Chaplain. Drake knew what that meant. They only sent the Chaplain when the situation was dire, and when they thought he or she might need to get close enough to the family to support them … in the end. Drake couldn’t let his mind go there yet. He inquired about his children, as he offered their names.

  ***

  Drake went to visit Max first. He was awake in the bed and watching Scooby Doo.

  “Hey, Buddy.” His dad handed him the stuffed dinosaur he had bought at the gift shop. “How are you feeling?” Drake longed to embrace his boy with every ounce of energy he had, but he knew to approach him carefully and gently for a while.

  “Daddy!” the little boy squealed with joy when he saw his father’s face.

  Max had a big bandage across the left side of his head. Drake swallowed hard and tried to fight the tears in his eyes, but they betrayed him.

  Another white coat appeared out of nowhere and said in soft tones, “This little guy was a trooper. Barely a bump or bruise to speak of. He is one tough boy.” Even more quietly, so only Drake could hear, she added, “It was a miracle.”

  The woman that stood before him had long chestnut locks, which barely reached the tops of her breasts. She probably did yoga, like Amber. Her body was very thin and fit. Normally, Drake would have made an inappropriate advance or comment toward her, but his only focus, for once, was his family, and he barely made eye contact.

  “I’m Doctor Leven. I was assigned to your son’s case this evening.”

  Drake shook her hand half-heartedly, but hoped it was enough to show his gratitude. Then, he returned his eyes to Max, and stroked his hair.

  “And my daughter?” His voice sounded nervous and relieved simultaneously.

  “I think she was assigned to Dr. Ellis. I will go check on her status, and let you know where to find her.” Dr. Leven disappeared just as quickly as she had come.

  Drake sat with Max, and tried to stay patient while he awaited news on his wife and daughter. In his heart, he continued to pray.

  “Daddy, we saw a big truck, and it hit us right in front of Mommy. Is Mommy okay?” Max had explained the accident so matter-of-factly, and with vivid description. Drake was amazed at how much his son’s vocabulary had advanced. Still, he didn’t want to upset Max with too many details.

  “Mommy has some boo-boos, Buddy, but the doctors are taking really good care of her.” Drake hoped he was right.

  Moments later, Dr. Leven reappeared and informed Drake that Annie would be out of surgery soon, and that Dr. Ellis would come find him.

  “Surgery?”

  “She had a few lacerations on her stomach, apparently from the car seat, but no other serious injuries. She will be moved to a recovery room soon.” Dr. Leven’s voice was calm and assuring.

  Again Drake sighed with relief. Both of his children were okay. He gave a thankful nod to the higher power above, and held his son for what seemed like an eternity, before another doctor came in.

  A hand was extended to Drake and he took it, with a renewed strength, due to the recent news about his children.

  The doctor was a male with short, spiked hair. The guy looked young enough to have just graduated from med school. Is he really qualified to take care of my baby girl?

  “I’m Dr. Ellis. I am the surgeon assigned to Annie’s case. She came through just fine and is in recovery now. You should be able to go see her momentarily. Do you have any questions for me, sir?”

  Sir? He knew that the young doctor was being polite and professional, but hearing that word made Drake feel as if he’d aged ten years in that moment. Where had the years gone and why hadn’t he treasured them more?

  “No, Doctor, and thanks for letting me know. I appreciate you taking care of my little girl.”

  “Just doing my job, sir,” the doctor replied with a smile. “You’re a very lucky man, Mr. Woods.”

  Drake thought for a minute on that word, lucky. He had to agree, although he was convinced that blessed was a more suitable description. He prayed God would grant him one last favor.

  Max was soon back to sleep, and Drake slipped out of the room to make some phone calls.

  Chapter Thirteen

  The Women in his Life

  How could Drake break the news that Jill’s little girl was in critical condition and fighting for her life? It would just reconfirm the previous suspicions she had of him—that he was too concerned about his own needs to make sure his family was taken care of. If it weren’t for him, Amber never would have been on that road.

  “Hi, Jill, it’s me.” He struggled to relocate the calm voice he had practi
ced. Drake took a deep breath and offered the good news first.

  “The kids are both fine. I haven’t seen Annie yet, but the doctor said she had only a few minor injuries.”

  “Oh thank you Jesus. And what about my Amber? Is she okay?” Broken breaths laced her voice.

  Drake was quiet for a moment, perhaps a little too long. His ability to speak came and went in sporadic rhythms as he explained to Jill that her only daughter was holding on by a thread.

  When he finished, she said something he didn’t expect. “Well, I’m glad you are there with them, Drake. I know you love Amber and the kids.”

  Drake almost dropped the phone in shock. He had never experienced anything close to that level of support from her. As he thought about his recent excursions and bad choices, he felt ashamed and undeserving of her respect. But that was not the time or place to unburden his demons on anyone else, least of all the only person in the world who possibly loved Amber more than him.

  After he hung up with Jill, Drake took a few moments to gather his thoughts, and then called his boss to inform him of the situation. To his surprise and relief, his boss was sympathetic, and said everything at the office would still be there when he returned.

  Just as he hung up the phone, the young Dr. Ellis touched Drake lightly on the arm.

  “Sorry to interrupt, Mr. Woods, but Annie is awake and asking for her Mom.”

  He put the phone back in his pocket, regained his height, and walked toward Annie’s room.

  ***

  “Hi, sweetheart, I heard you were quite the fighter today. That’s my strong girl.” He stroked the top of her hand gently. “I’m so proud of you.”

  Annie slowly turned her head toward her dad and said, “One minute mommy was crying and flipping through the radio, then a truck hit us out of nowhere and mommy was bleeding. Is she okay?”

  Again, Drake felt flabbergasted at how much his daughter had matured recently. Her confidence reminded him a lot of her mother. A few tears escaped, but he erased them with his fingers.

  “The doctors are working on her, sweetheart, but don’t you worry. They are very good at their jobs.” He was trying to convince himself with those words more than anyone else.

  Dr. Ellis reappeared in the doorway. “Hi, Annie. You were a very brave and cooperative little girl today.”

  Annie was the analytical type. She asked about the machines that surrounded her, and the numerous medicines they had administered for pain.

  “Wow, sounds like we might have a doctor on our hands here one day. Come find me when you are ready for a job, young lady.”

  Annie smiled, and then held her head for a moment.

  “She has been complaining about a slight headache, but that could be from the stress of the situation. Although we didn’t notice any trauma during the operation, we’d like to keep her for a couple of days for observation just in case.”

  Drake agreed, but somehow he knew his children were going to be okay, and hoped the same for their mother. He had already decided, in his heart, that things would be different from that day forward, but he certainly had no plans to be a single dad.

  Annie sat up in the bed and asked questions about her brother and mother. Drake answered them all as honestly as he could. Once the doctors gave clearance, he wheeled Annie down to her brother’s room so the three could be together. Later that evening, the hospital arranged for the siblings to have a family suite so they could unite more comfortably during their difficult situation. No news on Amber yet.

  Chapter Fourteen

  The Past is Not Always Left in the Past

  Drake awoke the next morning with a stiff neck and his legs tingled from sleeping on the fold-out couch. But when he looked over at his two children sound asleep, the pain melted away, and a sweet breeze of peace replaced it.

  Moments later, a news reporter and three camera crewmen invaded the room.

  “Mr. Woods, I’m Sarah Malcom from Channel 6 Live News. Can you tell us how you are feeling after this terrible tragedy?”

  A beautiful woman with straight, mid-length, chestnut-colored hair stood before him. She wore a royal blue skirt suit, white blouse, and nude heels, paired with flawless makeup. The reporter didn’t wait for an answer.

  “Can you update us on your wife’s condition? Where were you when the accident occurred? Aren’t you the couple from Kansas who hit the little boy?”

  Drake was overwhelmed and a little groggy. For a second, his mind flashed back to the scene in Kansas. The flashing cameras, and reporters in his face asking questions he wasn’t sure how—and didn’t want—to answer.

  Before he could respond, the hospital staff came in and cleared the room.

  “No reporters allowed in this area. Get out or I’m calling security.”

  Drake thanked the nurse with a subtle nod, and moved over to comfort his children, who had been awakened by the intrusion.

  ***

  While the kids ate lunch, Drake slipped out the door to inquire about his wife’s condition. The doctors offered him the “no changes” response he had come to loathe, and then led him to her room.

  She slept peacefully, with an abundance of beeping robotics all around her bed. The swelling had reduced, and she somewhat resembled his wife again. The doctors had let him briefly visit her the night before, but he was rushed out of the room when the nurses came in to run more tests, and informed him that his children were asking for him.

  Drake walked over to her bed, and brushed the top of her hand, just as he had done with Annie. He hadn’t noticed how beautiful she was lately. Despite the bruises, he could tell that her skin had been scarcely touched by the sun, but in a good way. Time had been good to her, even after two kids, and all the hell he had put her through. Drake pulled a chair close to her bed and held her hand. Then he lowered his head, seemingly in prayer, but in that moment, his words were for Amber.

  “Baby, I’m so sorry I’ve let you down. I haven’t been there for you and the kids, and I know that now. If it weren’t for me, you wouldn’t have had to run to your mother’s house. I promised you I’d take care of you, and you’d never have to worry about anything. Turns out, I was the only one you couldn’t count on.”

  He paused for a moment and tried to summon his voice again.

  “I want to tell you something about that night. When we were fighting, I was so angry and focused on what I wanted, I completely discounted your feelings. Resentment took over me, and I almost, for a second, said that I wished I’d never even gotten married so young, because then I could chase my dreams.”

  His tears flowed uncontrollably, and he buried his shame in the bed sheet, unable to even look at her.

  When he found his composure again, he continued, “I don’t even know what came over me. I didn’t mean it. It was just a passing selfish thought. But after the accident, I blamed myself … for feeling that way, and because my selfish actions took that little boy’s life. I felt like I didn’t deserve a family anymore. Every time I looked at Max, I thought of how I took a son away from his family. I just wanted to disappear. Our kids were better off with no father at all than one like me. I knew they were safe with you ...”

  He lost it again, as he thought about how he wasn’t able to protect his family from that horrible accident.

  “Just please come back to me and the kids. I promise I will make every moment of our life together the fairytale you deserve. I’m so sorry, Amber. Please wake up and tell me you forgive me.”

  There was no response. After a few more moments in silence at her bedside, Drake returned to his children.

  ***

  Three days later, the hospital released both children and they went to Grandma Jill’s, while Drake stayed behind to be with Amber.

  Jill had been in to visit her daughter briefly, but couldn’t manage to see her that way for very long. She said a small prayer over her child, and placed a bible beside the bed. She was supported by a nurse, who escorted her back to the waiting area
with Drake and the kids.

  “I want to be with my children, but I can’t leave Amber alone. I have to be here if …” Drake caught himself. … “When she wakes up.”

  “I understand. The kids will be fine. Just take care of my baby girl.”

  Drake kissed both of his children, and hugged them tightly, then watched them fade out of sight through the double doors. He had asked his mother-in-law to call him as soon as they made it home.

  Chapter Fifteen

  An Unexpected Guest

  Paul hit I-70 the minute he heard about Amber’s accident. Janie had called to cancel the two gym memberships, and Paul had answered.

  “What hospital is she in?”

  “St. Mary’s, but you can’t—”

  Paul didn’t let her finish the sentence. He thanked her and got off the phone. Until that moment, it hadn’t registered with him just how strong his feelings for Amber were.

  ***

  The double doors opened, and the same elderly lady who had greeted Drake stopped Paul in his tracks at the front desk.

  “Sir, can I help you?”

  “I’m here to see Amber Woods.” He was careful not to reveal who he was, just in case.

  “Are you family?”

  “Um, yes, I’m her brother.” Paul knew that in severe cases like Amber’s, hospitals usually only allowed family members to visit.

  He had a trusting face and was easy on the eyes, so the nurse let him through.

  Once he reached the ICU, the other nurses outside Amber’s room were smitten by his charm as well, and let him in to see her.

  Paul entered the room quietly and with cautious steps. He took her by the hand, ever so gently, as he sat by her bed. It was hard to believe that the woman he saw before him was the same girl he had looked forward to seeing at 10am every day for the past eight months. The bruises on her face and arms were still prominent, along with the swelling.

  He lingered for a few moments then turned to walk out.

  ***

  In the hallway, Drake bumped into him. After almost a week of sleep deprivation, paired with the stress of the situation, Drake blew up at the unknown man who had just exited his wife’s room.

  “Excuse me, but who the hell are you?”

  “Uh, I’m Paul. I’m Amber’s yoga instructor.” The intruder held out his hand.